Could the end of the dope holiday really
be nigh?
What worries me about the possible
decriminilisation of cannabis is that people will have one less reason to
travel. Going abroad in search of dope is one of those honourable traditions
that Bohemians, hippies and new-age travellers will one day look back on with
tears of nostalgia.
All backpackers worth their salt know
what it is to sleep in smoky Bombay dormitories with self-righteously dirty
Austrians and Germans, who suddenly whip crafted pipes out of their clothing
just at the moment your eyes were about to close in sleep.
The elaborate lighting-up ceremonies,
the smoky suckings and puffings, the silent offering around of the pipe like a
sacred talisman; these rituals mean as much for travel as Delhi belly and the
InterRail card.
And look at those generations of
students riding the waves to Holland
every Christmas vacation. As we all know, ragged young intellectuals do not
cross the North Sea
for tulips or the Van Gogh Museum .
They go for dingy peace cafes where spliffs appear on the menu next to the
mushroom quiche.
In years gone by, the further you
travelled the further the view disappeared into aromatic smoke. Before the war
the place to smoke a pipe was China . Shanghai
was so sinful that a blast of opium before bed was as respectable as a glass of
sherry.
In the Fifties it was Saigon
and Hong Kong
that filled with travelling dope-smokers, while the Sixties saw dope shops
spring up on the road to Goa
like garrison cities on the Silk Road . Istanbul 's
famous Pudding Shop was where you stocked up on the stuff before taking the
long dope road to India
and Nepal .
And if you couldn't make it to Katmandhu you took the short cut to Marrakesh
instead.
Otherwise you went to countries where
the whole local culture revolved around "substances". Countries such
as Columbia
where a mouthful of coca leaves was the local equivalent to a mid-morning
coffee, or the Yemen
where cabinet ministers chewed qat to discuss the national budget.
Meanwhile, airports from New
York to Singapore
crunched to the sound of dope being walked on, hidden inside travellers' shoes,
while rucksacks swilled with cannabis fragments disguised as bits of dirt.
Personally I call it madness, but there is no end to the madness of people who
associate dope with travel.
And yet how things have changed.
Smoking dope in Tony Blair's Britain
seems such a tame affair compared to the same, heart-stoppingly dangerous
offence in, say, King Hassan's Morocco or
Lee Kwan Yew's Singapore .
It won't be long before long-haired
dropouts from the universities of Delhi
and Bombay
start making pilgrimmages to British seaside resorts, where they will play
didgereedoos and relax naked under the stars. The curious residents of Bournemouth and
Brighton will earn pocket money by
selling dope to naked junkies.
Still later, in a long overdue act of
retribution, the Chinese will send their gunboats and force us to buy dope by
the tonne, whether we like it or not. We will no longer need to travel for our
dope and the tides of cultural history will have changed yet again.
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