Sunday, June 21, 1998

What shall we do about the lost tribes of Surbiton, Seattle and Sydney?


What shall we do about the lost tribes of Surbiton, Seattle and Sydney?




LAST WEEK it was reported that a 50-strong tribe had been "discovered" deep in the Brazilian rainforest. The tribe had spent the last 70 years trying to hide from prospectors - only to fall victim to an anthropologist. The question is being asked: what should we do about them?

I wonder what it feels like to be "discovered". The only comparable situation I can think of would be if the Lords of the Galaxy suddenly noticed the Earth for the first 
time and then got into a debate about what to do with the people who lived on it.

Naturally they would not dream of imposing their own galactic religion or social norms upon us. They would leave us to practise our own customs freely, and would not tolerate any old-fashioned nonsense such as missionary work or the exploitation of our planet for resources. This would be a simple question of respect. If Lords of the Galaxy started rolling up on Earth in their rocket ships in order to gawp at us, the whole fabric of our society would be placed in jeopardy. Once we had got to know about the fantastic standard of living enjoyed by the rest of the galaxy, we would not be content to endure the drudgery of being confined to Earth.

We would soon cast aside our primitive cloth-based fabrics and start dressing up in the latest plutonium foils. We would knock down our houses and erect towers of moonrock. Our youth would start cavorting with galactic travellers and lose all sense of their Earthly morality. As for technology - the visitors would leave our Ferraris looking like East German Trabants.

In short, we would lose our characteristically Earthbound appearance and start looking just like any old planet anywhere else in the galaxy. And what a loss that would be for the heritage of the universe.

No, tourism on Earth should be a controlled and discreet affair, designed so as not to disturb the local environment. Visitors would watch us going about our business from secure hides in the sky. They would be limited to strict quotas, and not expect the standards of comfort and hygiene to which they were accustomed.

Which is not to suggest that there would never be grounds for galactic intervention under any circumstances. If we Earthlings were in flagrant breach of galactic law, action might have to be taken. Our barbarous habit of eating meat would be looked at very carefully, as would our childish fantasy that there is such a thing as "property".

Then there would be our welfare to consider. Could the Lords of the Galaxy stand by while we insisted on pursuing our antiquated medical practices? Could we be permitted to grow old and die, for example, when the technology of eternal youth was available on the Galactic Health Service? Agonising choices would have to be made on our behalf. If our galactic overlords marched in and abolished human death,where would that leave our culture? Would we be taught the main galactic language of commerce? Without it, we would be disadvantaged in the galactic market. Unable to enter universities or find work, we would be trapped in a cycle of poverty.

Worried? Just think how the monks of Mount Athos must be feeling. The 1000-year-old tradition forbidding women from entering their "Monastic Republic" is under threat. Strict application of the Schengen Agreement - which allows free access to all parts of the European Union - may result in Athos being thrown open to women as well as men. Watch out for a lot of very, very angst-ridden monks.

Sunday, May 31, 1998

Portugal: Ox-drawn ploughs or golf-course buggies - the choice is yours


Portugal: Ox-drawn ploughs or golf-course buggies - the choice is yours

Beaches, hilltop villages and some serious wilderness in between - Jeremy Atiyah finds something for everybody in Portugal's seven provinces
Jeremy Atiyah 
Sunday, 31 May 1998
Minho
This is the far north-western corner of the country, hard up against the coast and the Spanish province of Galicia. One feature of the area is a countryside which is one of the poorest in Western Europe: farmers still rely on ox-drawn carts and ploughs. A great way to explore the region is by staying in Turismo Habitacao accommodation, otherwise known as Turihab, which is particularly plentiful in this area - grand old manor houses or farmhouses right off the beaten track (call the Portuguese tourist board on 0171-494 1441 for a brochure). The two urban centres in the region, neither of which are large, are Braga - packed with historic churches - and the finely preserved mediaeval city of Guimaraes, which incidentally has two of the country's finest pousadas (Portugal's de luxe, government- run hotels).
Tras-os-Montes
If anything, this province is even poorer than , and wolves are said to roam the mountain villages. It is a harsh landscape, freezing in winter and broiling in summer, but its two national parks offer some serious wilderness for hiking in. The top end of the Douro River valley runs through the southern part of the province, including the most important port-producing area.
The Beiras
This is actually three provinces: the litoral (coastal), alta (upper) and baixa (lower). As a whole, the region includes the country's highest mountain - the Serra da Estrela - as well as its longest river, the Rio Mondego. The highlands were the heartland of the Lusitani, a fierce indigenous people whose leader, Viriato, is a national hero for his stubborn resistance to Roman invaders 2,000 years ago. The highlight of the area is the ancient and hilly university city of Coimbra, perched above the Rio Mondego.
Estremadura
Curiously, Estremadura is not adjacent to the Spanish province of Extremadura, but squeezed up against the coast above Lisbon. Apart from Lisbon and Sintra, the main attractions are a few seaside resorts such as Ericeira, full of Lisbonites enjoying themselves at weekends in summer. In the north of the province are a couple of architectural masterpieces: a 12th-century Cistercian monastery in Alcobaca and the Gothic-Manueline monastery in Batalha.
Ribatejo
There is not much to shout about in this thin little province to the east of Lisbon, except for a couple of historic little towns, Santarem and Tomar, the latter being the one-time headquarters of the Knights Templar.
The Alentejo
The alto (high) and baixo (low) Alentejo between them make up most of the lower half of Portugal. In summer, the rolling plains are monumentally hot and empty - the land is divided into vast agricultural estates still based on the old latifundia, the original country estates established by the Romans two millennia ago. The place to aim for is the fantastically historic city of Evora. Fortified hilltop villages surrounded by miles of cork and olive are also a feature; Monsaraz is the best known.
Algarve
This is Euro-holidayland par excellence. Parts of the coast, especially between Faro and Lagos, have been predictably over developed and Albufeira probably takes the biscuit as the local Torremolinos, with its crowded pubs and restaurants catering exclusively to German and English holidaymakers. That's the bad news. The good news is that the sun shines warmly almost all year round, the beaches are excellent and, in recent years, luxury villa resorts and golf courses have been added to what is generally a low-cost market.
Leading specialist tour operators featuring Portugal include Destination Portugal (01993 773269), Portugala Holidays (0181-444 1857), Caravela Tours (0171-630 9223) and Latitude 40 (0171- 229 3164).

Sunday, May 24, 1998

Sun, sea, sights - and Colonel Gaddafi


Sun, sea, sights - and Colonel Gaddafi

Discovered by the Phoenicians, developed by the Romans, adored by the Greeks - Libya is a sensation you may never see. By Jeremy Atiyah




DON'T blame Colonel Gaddafi for seeking attention. Stranded half- way between classy Tunis and monumental Cairo, who wouldn't feel insecure? Libya has a population less than a tenth that of Egypt, scattered over an area nearly twice as large. If any country in North Africa was going to end up with a rock star for president, it had to be this one.
But apart from Gaddafi, is there anything to Libya? It calls itself the Great Socialist People's Libyan Arab Jumahiriya, which does not sound very charming. It has joined Saudi Arabia and Iran in banning alcohol. It operates a highly restrictive visa regime. And yet, with its Mediterranean beaches, sunny climate and fabulous antiquities, it seems to offer unlimited tourism.

On my visit a fortnight ago, I found no issue which excited the Libyans more.
"Oh yes," they kept telling me. "We are going to be a very big tourist country. But of course ... you must allow for the customs of our people ..." In other words, I understood, no beer and no bonking.

Luckily I was there just for a tour of antiquities. This was what Libya meant to me: it was an Arab land, built on Phoenician and Greek roots, sitting on a vast area of desert. And, since Lockerbie, you had to beat a UN air embargo to get there, which meant driving across the border from the nearest Tunisian airport.

"May your day accrue more benefit!" shouted the immigration police. The first thing that struck me on the Libyan side of the border were the high school girls in white socks and trainers, walking with their boyfriends. A hard-line Islamic state? Hardly. Anyway the scenery was far too benign for that, with golden wheat fields dotted by endless rows of olives.

This was no dour, desert environment. In the restaurants and hotels of Tripoli, I found everybody drinking espressos and switching unflappably back and forth between English, French, Arabic and Italian. But Tripoli did not feel like a capital city. Palm trees stuck their heads above flat, dusty roofs. The centre of town was overlooked by the cliff-like walls of the Crusader Castle. Container ships stood mistily off-shore. And there was the new city: an Italian-built, white-washed zone of balconies and green shutters, colonnaded walkways and sleepy cafes, serving excellent coffee. But no grappa.

Never mind. I escaped into the old city. A gentleman with a purple beret wobbled past on a bicycle; a youth in a gelabiyah held a mobile phone to his ear. The heart of Tripoli's commercial life? The boys manning stalls in the souk looked like stylish Inter Milan supporters. This had the air of a souk-in-waiting: waiting for the end of the embargo, waiting for tourists, waiting for history.

To be honest, some people looked as if they had landed here unintentionally. And so in a way they had. Tripoli was originally founded by Phoenician sailors 2,700 years ago as a staging post, somewhere to re-equip their boats on the way to Spain.

A mistake? Of course not. In Roman times this part of north Africa was destined to become one of the wealthiest in the world. Along with sister cities Sabratha to the west and Leptis Magna to the east, modern Tripoli became the centre of a province which the Romans would call Tripolitania: the Land of Three Cities.

Mussolini, when he barged into Libya 70 years ago, loved his Roman ruins. The Libyans, equally naturally, were not so sure. They preferred the Phoenician connection: Tripolitania may have been developed by Romans but it was a Semitic people, the Phoenicians, who got there first.

I arrived at Sabratha in a sand-storm, under a sky black with dust. The wind blew hot, and raindrops fell with the consistency of quicksand. Who cared? I saw a schoolgirl in a Leonardo Di Caprio T-shirt dancing beside a ghetto-blaster. Children laughed together under the pine trees. The Phoenician goddess Tanit (in whose temple ritualised orgies once took place) would not have been entirely displeased.

The first building I saw in Sabratha was a profoundly un-Roman looking mausoleum, a tall spire decorated by seated lions; but that was the extent of the Phoenician remains. I turned away and saw suntanned rocks, towering arches and tiers of columns filling half the sky. Like it or not, the Romans had left their mark.

Clearly this part of north Africa had not always been a backwater. Only the world's wealthiest cities could have afforded such theatres or temples, or decorated (say) their public latrines with statues of naked goddesses.

And the best was yet to come. The next day I was taken along a quiet road beside avenues of eucalyptus (Libya's main highway) to Leptis Magna. I stepped out to the smell of pine resin, the song of crickets and a warm wind in the grass. Sixteen hundred years ago this had been a city to rival Rome.

The entrance to Leptis is still marked by a monumental arch of Septimius Severus where winged goddesses high above the trees thrust out their breasts in victory, and colossal cornices top florid vine tendrils carved in stone. Open-jawed with amazement, I continued along the smooth paved street into town.

Back in the third century AD Leptis had the luck to produce a baby called Septimius Severus. Years later, as Roman Emperor, Severus would channel prodigious wealth back to his native land. From today's perspective, giganticism seems to be the theme: the public baths alone comprise dozens of 10-metre-high archways, with superhuman door lintels and walls as wide as elephants.

But even now I had not quite seen it all. Nearby, through a small back entrance down a sandy lane, I would step into the apocalypse itself.
Walking through the vast, dead square of the Severan Forum, littered with upended columns, I found myself surrounded by monumental gateways and loping arches. Staring faces of Medusa heads lay about amid the desolation. Meanwhile, in the Severan Basilica next door, gigantic roof entablatures had crashed to the ground, carrying their inscriptions with them, still awesomely legible after 2,000 years. There were no tourists; the only sound was of crashing waves on the beach outside.

Time for deep thoughts about the passage of time? Time for a visit to the harbour. This had once been a perfect circular bay, surrounded by breakwaters. Over the centuries the bay had silted up, until it became first unusable, and then unrecognisable. Today, it is covered not by ships but by long grass and rustling bamboo. Its entrance is a sandy beach.

After Leptis, it was hard to get up in the morning, let alone continue with the tour. The strange thing was that I had still only seen half of the country. The next stage was to drive across the great Gulf of Sirte, that hole in the map where the coastal landscape deteriorates into sheer desert and camels nibble by the roadside.

Not that the gulf was as empty as it used to be. This is now a big area for petro-chemical complexes and for Gaddafi's Great Man-made River, which passes through colossal pipes under the sand. One day, I was told, this land would be green again. The historic desertification of north Africa, no less, would be reversed.

East of here began that other Libya, the old Greek colony of Cyrene. A wet, fertile upland, its scenery is identical to Mediterranean Europe: a day later, I was driving in verdant hillsides interspersed by vineyards and rich golden fields of wheat. The wind blew fresh off the sea.

No wonder the Greeks liked it. The wonder is that more Libyans have not discovered it. The land seems largely empty except for scattered ancient cities, guarded by devoted old local archeologists who love their sea and sandstone. The sites are miraculously picturesque, like dreams of Provencale farmhouse gardens, with geraniums perched on Corinthian Capitols and silver columns tumbling into blue waters.

In Cyrenaica, the old stones have never been covered over by sand or forgotten. In fact, they have been picked over by bemused Arab shepherds and their flocks for centuries. At Tolmeitha for example - the ancient Ptolemis - I saw herds of goats under eucalyptus trees nibbling on dry grass sprouting from the ancient theatre.
As for Cyrene itself, on a high plateau overlooking the Cretan Sea, the great wonder is the fresh water spring pouring out of the mountainside. The Greeks built their temple of Apollo here; two-and-a-half thousand years on, it is still flowing strongly, providing yet another reason for the Libyans to feel good about themselves.

libya fact file
Getting there
The author's trip was arranged through the British Museum Traveller (46 Bloomsbury St, London WC1B 3QQ, tel: 0171 323 8895/1234). Its next 10- day group tour of Libya runs from 4 to 13 October and it will run more trips next year. The price of pounds 1,840 per person includes scheduled Tunis Air flights to Djerba, all transport, full-board accommodation plus the constant attendance of a tour lecturer. This autumn's tour will be with Susan Walker, deputy keeper in the Department of Greek and Roman Antiquities of the British Museum.

Operators
British Museum Tours makes its arrangements through a Libyan tour operator, Wings Travel and Tours (Tripoli, PO Box 1736, Libya, Tel:             00 218 21 3331855      , fax: 00 218 21 3330881). It can authorise visas for you on the basis of tour bookings. It arranges tailor-made trips to any part of the country, including the desert, with pick-ups from Djerba or, if you prefer, Cairo in Egypt.

Visas
If booking with British Museum Tours, it can arrange your visa (pounds 20 + pounds 15 procurement fee). Otherwise contact the Libyan Interests Section (0171 486 8387, or 486 8250 in the Saudi Arabian embassy). Note that you will need authorisation from Libya (obtainable through, for example, Wings Travel) before a visa can be granted. Visas for Tunisia are not required.

Further information
The author's flight to Djerba was arranged through Tunis Air (0171 7347644), which flies direct from Heathrow once a week on Thursdays, and via Tunis on any other day. Price from pounds 263 + tax, or pounds 283 for the direct flights.
There is also useful material, especially on how to get into the country, on the Sahara Travel Information website: www.users.globalnet.co.uk/ckscott/libya.html.

Sunday, May 3, 1998

FOR AS LITTLE AS...


FOR AS LITTLE AS...




pounds 113
per person you can take a Mediterranean cruise in the North Sea. Confused? Scandinavian Seaways is offering themed two-night cruises, which include Mediterranean meals, drinks and entertainment. Cruises begin and end at Harwich, and include two nights aboard ship as well as a shore excursion of a few hours at a continental port. Call 0990 333111.

pounds 189
per person, you can visit the Turin Shroud, currently on one of its periodic displays. This package includes return flights to Turin from London Heathrow (out on Saturday, back on Sunday) as well as one night's accommodation in a hotel located 600 metres from the Cathedral. Valid until June 14. Contact Italiatour on 0171 605 7500.

pounds 259
you can spend your late May bank holiday in Marmaris, Turkey. This price includes not only glorious weather but also seven nights in a two-star hotel with return flights from London Stansted, departing on May 25. Call Accommodation Overseas on 0181 977 2984.

pounds 268
you can spend a three-night break in Madrid during the month-long Fiesta de San Isidro. Lively even in the most sluggish of seasons, Madrid during fiestas should provide enough entertainment to keep anyone awake. Price includes flights, and central B&B accommodation. Call Kirker Holidays on 0171 231 3333.

pounds 473
you can fly to the Australian cities of Melbourne, Cairns, Adelaide or Darwin on Singapore Airlines (stopovers in Singapore permitted). You must depart between now and June 30, though can return any time. Very cheap accommodation in Singapore is also available. Call Travelmood on 0171 258 0280 or             01382 322713      (Scotland) for details.

pounds 699
you can take a three-centre "lakes and castles" holiday combining three nights in the Danish Lake District with three nights in a 16th-century castle on Funen island - as well as one night in Copenhagen. Price is based on a fly/drive package, including most evening meals. Call Scandinavian Travel Service on 0171 559 6666.

pounds 830
you can go white-water rafting for a week up the Coruh river in northern Turkey, travelling past the Kackar mountains, unspoilt villages and Byzantine castles. The trip lasts a week and cost includes flights, equipment and accommodation in tents. Breaks departing on 23 May are still available. Call Adrift on 0181 874 4969.

pounds 1158
you can enjoy 12 nights in the island of Praslin in the "real" Seychelles. Guests receive B&B accommodation in the Indian Ocean Lodge on the beach at Grand Anse. Praslin, the second-largest of the Seychelles, has both white-sand beaches and jungle-like vegetation. Call Elite Vacations on 0181 864 9818.

pounds 2,850
you can join the first ever British trek to the north-eastern Indian state of Arunachal Pradesh. This state has been largely closed to travellers owing to "tribal" unrest but now the tour operator Himalayan Kingdoms is pioneering tours there. Depart on November 2 for a 17-day holiday that includes trekking and rafting. Call 0117 923 7163.

pounds 2,999
you can fly round the world in business class with unlimited stops (including three in Australia) using Singapore Airlines, Ansett and Air New Zealand. The ticket is valid for one year and can be booked any time. For more pleasurable long-haul flights, call Bridge the World on 0171 734 7447.

Sunday, April 12, 1998

Russ Williams - 'Katowice is the kind of place that makes Burnley look like Las Vegas'


Russ Williams - 'Katowice is the kind of place that makes Burnley look like Las Vegas'




RUSS Williams is a constant traveller but his favourite passport stamp is a boring red one which just says: Union Island.
"I've been there three times and got three stamps," he tells me. "It is a mini mini island in the Grenadines - the kind of place where you can see the bottom in 100ft of water. It is so small and intimate that you can make out what people are doing in their front rooms as you fly in."

Snorkling and lounging on a catamaran in the Caribbean is his idea of a nice Christmas though he does admit that every other year he spends the festive season in Finland.
"I've been to Finland about 100 times because my wife comes from there. Her family have got a great place on an island with traditional log cabins and saunas; in Finland there's no nonsense about wearing a towel or swimming costume in the sauna: you're totally naked. And when you've finished you go out in the snow for a beer, then you go back in to beat each other with vine leaves. Strangers can't see a thing, because the island belongs to my wife's family."

Which all sounds pretty decadent, though when not working as a disc jockey Russ has plenty of down-to-earth interests: he is also a football writer.
"I travel a lot to see matches but there are a few stadia I'd still like to see. One is the stadium of Boca Juniors in Buenos Aires. The local derby between Boca and River Plate is the most hate-filled occasion in football. I'd love to see that."

And here's more proof that following international football can be a tough business:
"Last year I went to Katowice in Poland to see the England World Cup qualifier. It's the kind of place that makes Burnley look like Las Vegas. And it's lucky that my doctor is an amoeba specialist! I picked up a parasitic gut infection there which meant that I had to take the strongest dosage of antibiotics you can ever have - without going unconscious.

"And then immediately afterwards I went on a round-the-world trip for Virgin Radio, broadcasting from different cities as we went along, doing 29,000 miles in two weeks.
"The adrenaline kept me going for the fortnight but being ill was hellish. We did stuff like arriving in Hong Kong at 4pm, going on air between 6 and 9pm, then jumping on the 10.30pm plane for a nine-hour flight to Australia. It took me two or three months to recover from that trip.

"The most amazing show was in Mexico City, where I thought I was going to be shot on air. We were broadcasting from a dodgy bar, where lots of dubious characters were carrying guns. There were police too, who were supposed to be protecting our expensive equipment from being stolen, except that they kept wandering off - unless we kept handing them hundreds of dollars in bribes to stay.
"And all this was going on while we were doing the show! I couldn't exactly tell the listeners in detail because I didn't want to offend some of the nice Mexicans we had met. But that's the beauty of travel."

Russ Williams presents the mid-morning show on Virgin Radio (1215AM or 105.8 FM) from Monday to Friday. His book 'Football Babylon II' (published by Virgin) comes out in August.

Creme caramel amidst the rickshaws


Creme caramel amidst the rickshaws

There is a corner of India which will be forever France. Jeremy Atiyah joined the hippies and sadhus in Pondicherry

  
THE FRENCH only controlled one town in India, but what a town. They call it Pondichery, we call it Pondicherry. Either way, you would (rightly) expect it to be a steamy, sleepy Tamil place of dropping petals and bananas, populated by soft-treading, barefoot women with flowers in their hair, boney intellectuals on slow-mo bicycles, ash-smeared sadhus, lepers and hippies from Croydon.

But you would not expect these people to be obsessed with a 19th-century Cambridge intellectual and a self-appointed foreign messiah.
A deliberate travesty, but I am trying to make a point. The Cambridge intellectual was none other than Sri Aurobindo, who took a first in classics, and then became guru to India's best known ashram.

At least Sri Aurobindo was Indian. The self-appointed messiah was French. This was the woman known as the "Mother", whose kindly face stares down from the walls of every shop, restaurant and hotel room in town; and who, until her death aged 97 in 1973, had taken responsibility not only for running the ashram, but also for founding the nearby "international" city of Auroville.
But was there not just a little irony in a town full of Indians being so deferential to a member of the former imperial power?

"You are too immature," a bearded ashramite told me over an unpretentious communal lunch of brown rice, yoghurt, vegetable curry and bananas. "The Sri Aurobindo ashram is independent of these old-fashioned concepts. We do not think of nationality or religion. We are finding a new spirituality for the next millennium."
To my eyes, an ashram was a place where people went to learn wisdom from a guru, a monastic retreat involving yoga, meditation, and maybe a touch of hippyism?
"This ashram is about the virtues of work," came the stern reply. "The Mother taught us that everybody should seek enlightenment through work. We all have to be productive. We are not hippies." Oops.

As well as owning large swathes of Pondicherry, the ashram also employs half its citizens in cottage industries, producing goods ranging from perfumes to fabrics to paper. It even runs a number of guesthouses, including the Seaside Guest house, where I stayed: pounds 6 per night for a gigantic air- conditioned double room in a former colonial mansion. The fact that the Sri Aurobindo ashram is all about work does not stop people taking their holidays there. A lot of the guest house residents are visitors from Delhi and Bombay seeking temporary respite from their stressful lives.
As for meals - the ashram enables several thousand people to eat three large, wholesome meals a day in the former governor's residence, paying about 30 pence per head per day. If you are staying in an ashram guesthouse, you can share in this absurd bargain.

But was it the French who set the people of Pondicherry on their path to spirituality? Certainly the policemen carry bayonets, wear red kepis and are proud of it. And India's best mineral water is bottled here. At Le Club restaurant on the Rue Dumas - all whicker chairs and starched tablecloths - I went for a mid-morning fruit juice and was informed, with Parisian disdain, that drinks comprised "70 per cent juice and 30 per cent pure, chilled Pondicherry mineral water, Monsieur." The result was delicious.
And Pondicherry does not stop at fruit juice. Beer is served cheaper and colder here than anywhere in India. The new town contains off-licenses selling "genuine" Napoleon brandy. And the rooftop restaurants serving French food are excellent. Dishes range from approximations (the creme caramel in the Rendezvous) to the spot-on (the coq au vin in the Satsanga).

Of course Pondicherry is not all French. In the east of town, the traffic comprises bullocks, rickshaws, scooters and high-slung Ambassadors, trundling along streets where advertised services range from urology to advocacy to computer training to "shirtings and suitings" - a typical Indian high street, in fact.

But it was hard to deny that France had done something for the place. Tamil Nadu is not the Cote d'Azur, but Pondicherry makes more use of the sea than all other Indian towns put together. Of an evening, for example, romantic couples in Pondicherry come to canoodle in the Place de la Republique. Other improbable locations in the area include the Bazaar Saint Laurent and the Grand Hotel d'Europe, as well as the war memorial for the "French Indians" who died for France.

Basically, the French occupied the whole seaward side of town. Some of their old villas are now collapsing into mouldy piles of plasterwork; others, though, have been magnificently restored, with gleaming fluted columns and white ornamental balustrades running up to verandas overhung with banyan trees.

In the Church of Our Lady of the Angels, I found a troop of schoolgirl nuns and crows hopping between the neon strips. Outside, sleepy rickshaw drivers lounged under their own awnings and a builder with a tray of cement on his head whispered: "Bonjour, monsieur."
Or did he? It can be so hard for western visitors not to turn imperialist in India. Pondicherry was doing things to me the Mother may not have liked. Clearly the time had come for me to do her bidding - and make the pilgrimage to the city that was free of nationality and religion, Auroville itself.

That afternoon I joined a local group tour. On the bus from Pondicherry was an American lady whose desire to come to this place had arisen after meeting a "God Realised" woman in San Fransisco.
"Really?" asked a bearded German in sandals. "But what do you mean exactly by God Realised?"
"That woman just had no life. She'd sleep two or three hours, then spent the whole day, you know, giving darshen."

Indians in the group were also engaged in the task of understanding each other.
"From which city you are hailing, sir?" a Bengali gentleman was asking a Keralan. "The Tamils' command of Hindi is terribly poor!" an Assamese was exclaiming.
Such multi-culturalism was perfect for a visit to the future city of the world. On the way we had passed orchards, banana-fronde huts and bullock carts; now in the visitor's centre we were looking down on a scale plan of the completed city as it is designed to look some time in the next millennium.

"The shape is of a galaxy, with cement arms lined by corridors of greenery swirling around a hub," explained our guide. "The four arms of the galaxy represent the industrial, international, residential and educational areas of the city. At the hub is the Matrimandir Temple."

For those who care, Auroville does not look likely ever to be finished. Given that its foundation stone was laid on 28 February 1968, I saw remarkably little evidence of any construction at all. We were told that only 45 per cent of the necessary land had so far been bought - efforts are still being made to acquire the rest.
We peered about dirt tracks, trees and lots of flowering shrubs with names like "progress" and "psychological perfection". A building site? Some half-constructed public buildings emerged from the trees like Aztec ruins - the conference hall we were informed ("Can you hear the acoustics?").
The one building in Auroville that might have been worth writing home about was the Matrimandir Temple itself. There in the heart of it all, the temple was approaching completion.

To reach it, we began passing checkpoints manned by Auroville volunteers. Walk here! Stand there! Remove shoes! No bags or cameras! No talking please! Single file!
Even without this reduction of our scraggly tour group to the level of the Mother's school children, the first glimpse of the temple, a great golf ball dome filling the horizon, would have been quite impressive. Eventually, we were told, it would even be covered in fibre-glass gold- plated disks.

Stepping inside the dome, we saw ramps flying off in all directions above our heads, with teams of ant-like workers apparently at work. A perfect James Bond set. We proceeded, like prisoners, along a circular spiralling walkway that took us slowly to the top, passing signs reminding us that no "dampness, dirt or dust" would be allowed into the innermost chamber.

And finally there it was, a momentary glimpse through a doorway of the innermost sanctum itself, a high enclosed room of unadorned white marble, housing nothing but a huge glass crystal, catching mystical light from a hole in the ceiling. The heart! The key, the essence, the innermost truth - of Auroville!

I shuddered to imagine any community at all, let alone a "world city", basing itself around such a corny architectural concept. Blame it all on Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, I told myself, as we drove back to the bananas, the petals, the rickshaws, the smells, the beer and the delightful Eurasian chaos of Pondicherry.
pondicherry fact file

Getting there and around
The author flew to India as a guest of Gulf Air (0171-408 1717), who fly to Madras (now known as Chennai) from London on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. The fare is pounds 481 plus around pounds 27 taxes. Pondicherry is 160 miles south of Madras. Fly to Madras and take a prepaid taxi, booked inside the airport, to Pondicherry. The cost will be less than pounds 15. Otherwise, hot, crowded buses from Madras cost 50p.
For internal flights, the author used the excellent Indian airline Jet Airways (UK reservations: 0181 970 1525). A 15-day pass for circular or same-direction routings costs $550 (pounds 338). Sample one-way fares include Bombay-Madras ($154) and Delhi-Madras ($235).

Where to stay
The author stayed at the Seaside Guesthouse on the seafront (14 Goubert Avenue), where huge air-conditioned doubles are available for around pounds 6. The ashram also owns several other guesthouses in town. If you wish to dine in the ashram, tickets covering breakfast lunch and dinner can be obtained from the guesthouse for around 30p per day.

Visas
All British passport holders require visas in order to visit India. Contact India House, Aldwych, London WC2B 4NA (            0891 444544       for recorded information, calls cost 50p/minute).